Another bizarre but entertaining dream… Swiss Octopi, anyone?

I found it very difficult to wake up this Monday morning simply because I was having such a fantastic, non-school-related dream and I wanted to see how it played out. (This often happens — awesome and interesting dreams that I want to stay in to see how they end — but I tend to forget to write them down.)

In my dream, I travelled to Switzerland with a friend of mine, a colleague who retired from teaching a few years ago. Not sure why I was going there but I think it had to do with a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity, or perhaps scouting for a potential school trip. Anyway it was lovely: the scenery, the colours, a small boutique store in which I was looking for hand-made souvenirs for the family (I was having trouble picking between carved figurines, cooking spices, candles and such), an organic farm providing not only fresh produce but tours for butterfly watchers (they were closed for maintenance, sadly), and then I remembered that I hadn’t switched my phone from roaming. Eeek! The charges! I checked my phone and fortunately, I’d turned off the function so I wouldn’t get charged for using long-long-long distance to update my social media feeds, but that meant I’d have to find another way to post my cool travel pics. I especially wanted to post pics of carved garden gnomes. There were a few of them, although the Swiss people I asked didn’t seem to think that their presence was significant. Wrong country, I guess.

Anyway, I realized that my phone’s charge was getting dangerously low, so I went asking around for a charger. That turned into being taken on a tour of a carnival in a little village nestled in a valley, with a shallow river or lake winding through the cobblestone streets. It was very cool, although there were a lot of the same attractions I’d seen in another place: a grotesque masked club that was part dancing, part haunted house; t-shirt sales with tie-dyed and cartoony designs; balloon animals; a booth with gnomes. The attendants were fun and flirty but harmless. I noticed that fish were flapping about on the surface of the water, darting into the air to catch insects for their meals, but it was really hard to get pictures of them on my iPhone. I went closer to the edge of the pool and saw that the water was beautifully clear (probably due to being glacier-fed), and I could see a little brown octopus flitting about, chasing fish, and there was a manta ray as well. The fish were flying in the air to escape the octopus, I could see. I took pictures of that, too. A dog splashed into the water and had to be rescued before he became a meal for the octopus. Then I really needed to recharge my phone so I went back to my new friend’s house.

That’s where the kidnapping happened.

I don’t really know what happened to my travelling companion. She’d gone back to the B&B, I think. So I was alone with this girl and her very accommodating family. The house was sweet, cottage-like, and they offered me soup and tea. But I got creeped out by their suggestions of joining their family and marrying one of their sons — I tried to explain that I was already married and had children and a husband waiting for me to return home. They kept smiling at me and I realized that they’d drugged the tea. I refused to drink it, but I passed out anyway, having eaten the soup which had also been drugged. (At this point the matriarch looked at the camera being held by a documentary crew that was following me around and explained that she’d drugged the soup just to make sure they had me. Yeah, and the crew didn’t do anything to stop her. Told you this was bizarre!)

So then I woke up all disoriented and bleary, in the middle of a strange wedding ceremony involving being draped in a white fur cloak and paraded to different parts of town and drinking spiced wine from a bowl. I was partway through a circular route, at the end of which I would be married. I knew my travelling companion had raced home to let my husband know that I was in trouble, but I still struggled to get away and I ended up in the water. Just as the octopus was about to get me, someone grabbed it and wrestled it away. I got out of the pool, freezing and gasping, and turned around to see my husband — wait, that’s not him, that’s Spencer from iCarly, what the heck?!? — throwing the octopus deeper into the lake. He’d come to rescue me!

Plus, he was shirtless. Interesting. I looked closer. He was very skinny. Less interesting. Some ab definition, though, and a hint of pectorals. More interesting!

Now we were in a museum/art gallery, trying to shake off the creepy family. More gnomes. Pieces for sale — no, don’t get distracted by shopping for souvenirs, you have to get home! Spencer and I were trying to work out a plan, and then I actually woke up.

Damnit. I woke up! How did it end?!? Did I get away from the creepy family? Why was Spencer there? What was with all the garden gnomes? So weird… I almost want to go back to bed to try to pick up where I left off, but that never works.

I could sit and analyze the crap out of this, but for now, I bask in its weirdness.


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